Was there not a passage about how he washed feet or something?
This is aphobic. Asexuals are human too.
I’m pretty sure Paul had the celibacy fetish and introduced the sex=bad element to the dogma. Some scholars even suggest that was his thing since the other gods were sex positive. (At least toward men getting laid.)
Post biblcal Christianity was informed, in part, by Hellenic philosophical traditions, which were apollonian in nature. Women’s sexuality was on the dionysian side.
I honestly can’t say, but I know one thing for certain.
the man loved to get nailed.
More resigned to it. Has to close his eyes and think of England.
Unsurprising, he was hung too.
His best buddy was super hung. You can’t tell me the J-man didn’t know about his fellow J’s swinging.
Long hair, glamorous face, skinny ripped body? Jesus was a twink.
Not Korean Jesus. He’s swole af. Turns water into pre-workout.
Most carpenters I’ve ever known were more boobs men
Cock.
He was a fisher of men, after all. 😏
He was homosexual based on all his male buddies he liked to have dinner with. So, definitely an ass lover.
Boobs? Ass? Ew. He was clearly a dong man. That whole bit about parting the sea? He actually just whipped out his gigantic cock and created a bridge with it.
I thought “parting the Sea” was a euphemism for spreading some bussy?
Pretty sure that was a different guy. Both had giant dongs they could part water with, but the Red Sea was definitely Moses.
This post comes up every so often, and every time either I, or someone else, reminds people that one of the Bible’s biggest stories is that of Jesus washing Mary Magdalene’s feet. Mary Magdalene was a “street walker” at the time, which is old times speak for hooker, thus making him a feet guy
He washed all the disciples feet ;)
Maybe it was like a Tarentino thing. You work with this guy for years and feet keep coming up so one day you ask him and he’s like “yeah ok, I’ve got a foot thing but it’s a personal thing” and you leave it at that but then you remember at the start of your career doing foot photos with him and you’re too embarrassed to ask but you always wonder…
No, washing feet was a common thing - they wore sandals or walked barefoot most of the time, it was a common hygiene practice. It was just a task for “submissive”-classed people - the wife would wash the husband’s feet, and so on.
Jesus was subverting social norms in multiple ways.
Jesus seemed like a great dude. Shame that none of his followers pay attention to the lessons he taught.
So what you’re saying is… Jesus was a bottom.
Service sub
I know I just thought it was funny
You gotta be careful though, because the Bible basically called every woman that is featured in it a whore. A lot of this is actually more modern translation stuff, clerics of the dark ages loved adding whore to ever female description
clerics when they see a woman:
clerics of the dark ages loved adding whore to ever female description
Holy shit they were based in 500 AD?
Agreed he had an obsession with washing peoples feet. As I see it, as an evolved and enlightened human he was probably a pan sexual with a feet washing fetish
There are claims that the translation of the bible is wrong on this though.
In short, feet might mean genitalia. I really have no opinion on it, but it makes a lot of sense. The purpose of even describing the submissive act of washing feet aligns well with the old Greek teacher and pupil relationships to present Jesus as a stand up guy who will go down on anybody, men or women, regardless of their status. He took your sins and such.
The message is the same anyway, so I suppose it has been whitewashed a bit throughout the years.
The reason why I want to believe it is that it would also explain why he was so popular that contemporary writers would bother writing anything about him.
This sounds heretic as fuck so I’m gonna roll with it
There’s nothing that points to Mary Magdalene being a prostitute. She’s conflated with another character who was, but they aren’t directly connected in the text.
TIL ace people aren’t “fully human”
Likely not according to the church.
Unless they’re clergy
They’re cyborgs.
Arguably better
Well, Christ came riding upon an ass, so I think this is an easy question to answer
Lust is sinful, and Jesus was without sin, though
“let he who is without sin cast the first stone” *picks up rock*
Ergo he exploited the poophole loophole, thus our brother in Christ was (is?) an ass man.
The whole “camel through eye of a needle” allegory is a hidden clue for anal obsession /s
Having attraction preferences doesn’t mean you’re lustful.
You’ll figure out your attraction preferences through lust, though
Depends on whom you’re asking, but lots of christians consider it a sin outside of marriage. Super healthy message to give young kids /s
The context is moreso “everyone is sinful” because everyone does it.
It doesn’t matter 'cause it would be a miracle if he brought a lady home.
Because while Jesus was prayin’
Fuckin’ Craig was layin’
Every lady in the testament
You know what I’m sayin’
HES FUCKING CRAIG
craig christ
I wouldn’t die for your sins, like my famous kin,
but if you got a little sister then there’s room at this inn!
I’m not my brother, I know
Don’t walk on H2O
But I got hydroponic shit that me and Judas grow
Well there are several stories in the Bible about Jesus riding an ass, but none about Jesus riding boobs. So I think it’s safe to say Jesus was an ass man.
This logic is sound. Concur.
Granted, you’d have to find some way to harness together quite a few boobies in order for them to be able to pull anything much, since they’re not huge birds. But if you get enough of them, maybe you could fly.
Are we taking about an African or European booby?
It’s a simple matter of weight ratios.
